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These feelings of depression won't go away. Time isn't healing me? I met a guy at a party and sparks just flew... It was crazy. He was so good looking and charismatic. I was wonderstruck I tell you. And then I found out that he felt the same way about me.
We talked a lot and we finally went on a date. It was nice. We laughed a lot and there wasn't any awkward silences or lulls in conversation. I was so sure that it was meant to be. I mean, we BOTH noticed each other at a huge party. What were the chances?
He kissed me on the first date. I don't date very much and I've never had a real boyfriend so I just assumed that this was normal.
On the second date, we watched a movie at his house. I was naive and didn't know that a 'movie' equaled him trying to get into my pants. We started making out, he ripped my shirt off, put my hand down his pants, then pushed me down so I would give him a *******. I did whatever he wanted me to do because I really wanted to be with him. He was so good looking and I liked him. I thought that if I resisted or said 'no' that he'd just tell me to leave and never come back. I know it was the second date, but I didn't think much of it. I thought, well, maybe this is the way things are supposed to happen for us.
He drove me home later that night, said he'd talk to me soon. I was smiling and really happy that things seemed to be going well. He seemed to like me. Why else would he have kissed me and cuddled with me? He must have at least thought I was attractive. He wouldn't have touched me if he didn't.
Five days went by. I swear he fell off the face of the earth. Nothing. On the sixth day I finally called him and he said he's been busy with school. It was a two second conversation and I knew something was wrong.
He deleted me off msn, facebook, everything. He wasn't answering my texts either. Then I heard from a mutual friend that he was at a bar telling all his friends that he "got with my double d **** and was done with me."
He went from someone so sweet to... I don't even know what. A monster. He finally responded to a text, but only to tell me that he's done with me, because 'we' can't be fixed. He said I'm psycho and he's not dealing with our 'situation' anymore. I don't even know what happened.
He denied ever telling anyone that he was done with me. But I don't believe him. I apologized to him for accusing him of talking smack about me in hopes that maybe he would just settle down. I don't care if I have to apologize for something that isn't my fault. I just didn't want him to end this.
His friends told me that he does this to girls. He acts completely sweet and gains their trust, and then he gets what he wants, and never talks to them again.
I'm having issues getting over this. Its been slightly over two months and I still cry every day. I hate him so much and he even made me hate myself. He was my first kiss and first everything else. I'm 19 by the way. His looks still make me swoon and I just wish I knew what I did. He made me hate myself (because of what I did with him so early). I just don't know where to go from here.
I keep having these hopes that he'll come back to me. But its so unrealistic. This is just an emotionless cycle of breaking girls' hearts for him. I'm nothing but another number. | | Your last paragraph sums it up perfectly. He is the monster, not you. I am really sorry he abused your trust and hope like that. Every time you see his picture or name, I bet you feel a stab of pain. So, delete him off of everything. Everything! If you stay in contact and play the What If... game, you will just torture yourself. I know, because I've done it. Get out there! Mix and mingle! Do it as a distraction, if nothing else, even if you are not ready to date yet. Move on. You deserve a better man anyway. (remember, HE is the monster, not you) | What is my body type? Ecto , meso , endo? Ok.. I was just wondering what my body type is.. Cause I'm really happy with my body. I can gain muscle real fast. My body stores little body fat. I'm 14 and i weigh 140 lbs... My height is 5'9 . I have a huge chest( not like ***** **** .. It's the real muscular types) i have muscular shoulders and I'm the strongest guy in my grade. I can workout for 2 hours without breaking a sweat. And I'm like the hairy monsters. I have quite alot of fat near my belly. So what's my body type? | | Sounds really exciting, would love to see that body sounds sexy... |
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